Why am I always so sad

I don’t know what it is that I’m going through but I hope I get over it soon cause I really don’t know how much longer I can take of this. I feel like I’m gonna break down, and give in soon.. I can’t deal with it anymore.. I’m exhausted.. I’m drained.. I just wanna give up..

I’ve never felt this alone before.. I’ve felt alone before but this year seems like it’s been the worst. How is it that I have you yet I feel like I have nobody..

It breaks my heart that you can’t even stand being in the same room as me anymore..

For the longest time, I was afraid of dying.. Not because my life was ending but the thought of no one caring that I was gone.. That I would just be forgotten was so heart breaking.. The thought of it hurt.. But I honestly don’t care anymore.. No one cares when I’m alive so why does it matter when I’m dead.